tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-319154392024-02-02T05:00:34.390-08:00More Musings on Christianity, Homosexuality & the BibleStraight, cisgender, mother of three kids, former homeschooler, evangelical and Reformed. Okay, now that the scary part is out of the way, see "More about me" to find out why I support gay marriage in society and oppose it in the church.Misty Ironshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03375350124307819943noreply@blogger.comBlogger332125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31915439.post-51649047647820957372022-10-09T19:56:00.002-07:002022-10-09T19:56:47.389-07:00My Revoice22 Conference TalkThank you to all those who gave me encouraging feedback about my Revoice22 talk. Here is the link to my manuscript: "<a href="https://drive.google.com/file/d/1cpF9k3QD4j-lzHAK7eawg3IoAA75VGQf/view?usp=sharing" target="_blank">Ashamed of the Gospel.</a>"<br />
Misty Ironshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03375350124307819943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31915439.post-85878144345255914752022-05-13T17:42:00.000-07:002022-05-13T17:42:21.064-07:00The Center for Faith, Sexuality & Gender publishes my Revoice21 talkYou might be familiar with The Center for Faith, Sexuality & Gender, a ministry headed up by Preston Sprinkle and Greg Coles. They have kindly offered to publish the manuscript of my Revoice21 talk (only slightly edited for publishing purposes). You can find it <a href="https://www.centerforfaith.com/blog/new-testament-gentiles-and-gay-christians?fbclid=IwAR31_5Ew-mOpp--o4gJO3arRBk-S6HYblki5wqqtpxjSX5k--X_cunu2xQ4" target="_blank">here</a>. Misty Ironshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03375350124307819943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31915439.post-68943980880595823032022-02-05T13:20:00.002-08:002022-02-05T13:20:34.710-08:00My Revoice21 TalkIf you have come here looking for my Revoice21 talk, "The Church and the Gay Christian - A View from the Pew," here is the <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c_nB6BHqu6c">link</a>.Misty Ironshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03375350124307819943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31915439.post-5982250968368455662016-10-10T22:18:00.002-07:002016-10-10T22:18:42.860-07:00By your measure it will be measured to youThe relationship between the evangelical church and the LGBT community has changed dramatically over the last two decades. The church used to be far more public in their condemnations of gay and lesbian people, failing to distinguish between biblical teaching and false and ignorant claims. For instance evangelical leaders used to say that people chose to be gay, that gay people were capable of becoming straight, that gays were child molesters, that they recruited children into homosexuality, and on and on.<br />
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Nowadays, you don't hear such talk dominating the airwaves, partly because many straight Christians have caught up on the learning curve. Christian kids started coming out to their parents, forcing parents to rethink everything they've been taught from the pulpit. Gay parents even started coming out to their kids, and friends came out to their Christian friends. It used to be too costly to risk these relationships by coming out, but once it started happening, people became emboldened by the examples of those who went before them. And once pastors became aware that they were accountable for what they said about gay people who were sitting right there in their pews (along with their family members), they started toning it down.<br />
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Society has also put the squeeze on. The more progress LGBT rights have made, the more politically incorrect it has become to fall back on the rhetoric of 1995. And now with social media passing on information so quickly, no one can be certain that what they say publicly will only be contained to a sympathetic audience. Maybe your congregation will be on board with a traditional interpretation of Romans 1, but you risk catching heat from outsiders if your sermon ends up getting passed along on YouTube or Facebook.<br />
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What that leaves is a certain population of the conservative Christian community who are holed up in trenches, who still buy into the old-school view of homosexuality but have been forced into a defensive posture. What some call compassion, they call cowardice. What some hail as enlightenment, they condemn as compromising the truth. Not long ago they were a dominant force in shaping the values of society, yet now they are suddenly ignored, ridiculed and shouted down. And pretty soon, they predict, they will be persecuted.<br />
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You do not have to be very old to remember a day when the tables were turned the other way; when it was the other odd-ball, strong-willed minority group in society that was ignored, ridiculed, shouted down, and very much persecuted. I have always thought it strange that the LGBT community and the evangelical community seem to have so much in common. And now that the tables <i>are</i> turned, and the one-time persecutors now fear that they will become the persecuted, I find myself having mixed feelings that often leave me staring at a blank screen when I think about what to say on this blog.<br />
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The Bible is full of verses that say, essentially, what goes around comes around. The merciful will be shown mercy, but for those who fail to show mercy . . . alas, that bad boomerang is guaranteed to circle back eventually. It's going to hit all of us, myself included, because I continue to be a part of the conservative church that is historically guilty of lacking mercy and compassion.<br />
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The scary thing is that even though more Christians than ever come up to me lamenting bitterly about how "you can't have a biblical view of homosexuality anymore without risking persecution," they seem to think that those of us who have been trying to love the LGBT community have caused the problem. Sort of implying that if only we had persecuted the gay community <i>more</i> we wouldn't be in this mess of letting them get the upper hand.<br />
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I never have the heart to suggest to these Christians that, actually, we may very well be reaping what we have sown. That maybe God has heard the cries of LGBT people of faith (I know that many, many prayers have been lifted up over the years), and he is finally giving them relief. If indeed it is God that we have to contend with, the question is whether we are spiritually sensitive enough to 1) recognize what is happening, and 2) respond in a way that spares us the full measure of his indignation.<br />
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It begins with having the humility to recognize that we have done wrong in the first place, and sadly I don't see that we're even close to taking that first step. But if we do get there by some miracle, I would suggest that we humbly ask God for forgiveness for our past sins in persecuting the LGBT community, and for grace to bear fruit in keeping with repentance. We need to ask for the kind of mercy for our sins that we should have given to them for theirs, and to be spared the kind of suffering that we caused them as we hardened our hearts to their needs and turned a deaf ear to their voices.<br />
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We do not want to find ourselves in a situation where God hardens his heart to us and turns a deaf ear to our prayers, but it is exactly what we ought to expect if we do not take a long look at ourselves in the mirror of his Word. Soon.<br />
<br />Misty Ironshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03375350124307819943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31915439.post-34031240188282849412016-10-02T13:30:00.000-07:002016-10-02T13:30:01.225-07:00Welcome new followersIt's been awhile since I've done this, my apologies. Here are the newest followers, though some of you have been hanging around for awhile:<br />
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Fokke Pathuis<br />
David<br />
frank Fisher<br />
Garrett Biehle<br />
Harold Oberheide<br />
Jill Hurley<br />
turtlejeeps<br />
Julia Smith<br />
Reloaded<br />
pj clutterbuck<br />
Lauryn Farris<br />
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Thanks for coming aboard!Misty Ironshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03375350124307819943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31915439.post-53417294711684267412016-08-31T11:14:00.001-07:002016-08-31T16:21:55.458-07:00Narcissism in the church<i>"I may not have handled it perfectly, but this is really all your fault."</i><br />
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<i>"I'm sorry if I hurt you, but you should have known I'd react that way."</i><br />
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<i>"It's true I may have some faults, but your sin is really the problem here."</i><br />
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Jesus called it "look[ing] at the speck in your brother's eye, but [failing to] consider the log in your own eye." We sometimes refer to it as "Pharisaism." The secular psychologist more accurately calls it "narcissism."<br />
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You see it in the church, just as Jesus saw it prevalent in the synagogues of his day. The "Christian" narcissist is a spiritually bankrupt person who covers up for his or her false spirituality by presenting him- or herself as morally superior to everyone else. These people flock like vultures to the spiritually vulnerable, anyone who is susceptible to being condemned by public opinion or even their own sensitive conscience. They might even build up a righteous reputation for themselves at the expense of the people they've broken and condemned, and launch themselves into positions of church leadership so that they have power to do even further damage.<br />
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You know them. You've met them. You wonder why they rise higher and higher while you struggle to wake up every morning and face a new day in this crazy, broken world.<br />
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Amazingly there is a blog--an entire blog--dedicated to investigating what the Bible has to say about narcissism. The author chooses to remain anonymous, but you can tell from their reflections and interactions with the Scriptures that this person is a very mature Christian.<br />
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The blog is called <a href="https://biblicalperspectivesonnarcissism.com/" target="_blank">Biblical Perspectives On Narcissism--Recognizing and Dealing with the Evil of Insolent Pride.</a> Read carefully, ponder soberly and enjoy.<br />
<br />Misty Ironshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03375350124307819943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31915439.post-29385614855107300722016-07-02T19:17:00.002-07:002016-07-02T19:18:33.649-07:00Quote for the day<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;">
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"I did not learn my theology all at once, but I had to search deeper for it, where my temptations took me . . . Not understanding, reading, or speculation, but living--nay, dying and being damned--make a theologian."<br />
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--Martin Luther<br />
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Misty Ironshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03375350124307819943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31915439.post-51110431671456557792016-06-13T08:34:00.000-07:002016-06-13T08:34:16.649-07:00Unsafety zoneIn the summer of 2000 I made my first trip to West Hollywood to go to a LGBT bookstore called A Different Light. Those were the days before Amazon.com, when we had to drive to bookstores to browse for available publications. I was just starting to read coming-out stories and wanted to follow up on certain gay authors whom I found to be accessible. Barnes & Noble bookstore had a dismal gay and lesbian selection so, like a good cross-cultural missionary, I decided I would go out of my comfort zone to gain access to points of view different from what I was used to. I just wanted to understand.<br />
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A Different Light bookstore was located on a busy main street that ran through the heart of West Hollywood. I found plenty of interesting volumes to browse: fiction, nonfiction, poetry, history. As I was flipping through a theology book, three young men entered the store. They walked in together, laughing and talking loudly, and it was clear they had come in to harass the customers, not buy books. Tension filled the entire store as the cashier ordered them out. I was standing about twenty feet from the entrance and watched them walk almost past me before they turned around and exited.<br />
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It was my first time at a LGBT bookstore and that happened. It never occurred to me that by being there I'd have to worry about my safety. Those three guys didn't care who I was, a straight pastor's wife doing a bit of cross-cultural research. If they had brought guns I would have been one among many casualties of another hate crime in West Hollywood. That's when it dawned on me: LGBT people have to worry about their safety all the time. The incident gave me the barest glimpse into that reality.<br />
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That didn't stop me from making return visits to the bookstore or, later on, attending LGBT conferences and events. But I'm aware now that safety is something I can take for granted in a way that my LGBT friends cannot. And what happened in Orlando yesterday morning has done untold damage to what little sense of safety and security they have fought so hard to achieve. Until you've been on the receiving end of anti-gay hostility, it's hard to explain how frightening it is.Misty Ironshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03375350124307819943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31915439.post-65020340522655208372016-05-14T10:59:00.000-07:002016-05-14T10:59:48.176-07:00My 2016 GCN keynote transcript now available in Spanish<i>Muchas gracias</i>, Jacob Pintle, for translating my 2016 GCN keynote speech into Spanish! You can find the link to it on Jacob's blog <a href="https://jacobpintle.wordpress.com/2016/05/11/homosexualidad-que-sigue-para-la-iglesia-evangelica-conservadora/" target="_blank">here</a>.Misty Ironshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03375350124307819943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31915439.post-52869884462424021942016-04-08T12:29:00.000-07:002016-08-25T20:48:49.815-07:00To my fellow Christians,It's hard to know what to say anymore.<br />
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It's hard to know what to say when many of you who profess to be Christians still need to be told that gay and lesbian people are human beings, made in the image of God. That you shouldn't hate people that God made. That when you hate someone you are crushing their soul. That God does not call us to crush people's souls.<br />
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Is this a revelation?<br />
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Getting chewed out by your boss can ruin your day. Getting criticized by your spouse can make you resentful and depressed. You start doubting yourself. You feel deflated. You might even feel like crying. It's awful, but you know it will pass. There are things you can do to rectify the situation. There are things you can do to distract yourself from negative feelings until better days arrive.<br />
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Few of us know what it's like to be hated. Not hated because someone is jealous of you, or because you rub someone the wrong way. That's more like resentment. Hatred is when someone despises your very existence. Their hatred does not center on what you say or do, but who you are. You see how their eyes change when they look at you. They are not looking at a fellow human being with casual acknowledgement and acceptance. Rather their human soul seems suddenly to have vacated the premises and now you have no connection with their person. No compassion or understanding or common humanity to depend on. You know that anything you do or say will only confirm in their mind that you don't deserve to exist on the same planet.<br />
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It is the emotional aftermath of a bad day at work or a fight with your spouse intensified a hundred times. This is not about being deflated or discouraged. Hatred is a soul-withering assault on someone's deepest sense of self. And when you experience it enough times with enough people, you really begin to believe that you don't deserve to exist at all.<br />
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Imagine what it would be like to receive such vibes from people who profess the name of Jesus Christ. Who pray and sing and worship and give out big hugs and smiles. You are drawn to these loving, joyful people. You think you even see Jesus in them when they speak glowingly of their love for God. Maybe they will love you. Maybe there is hope for you. Yet they are the ones who turn to you and say, "Gays are going to hell." "God has given you over to your depravity." "You'd be better off dead than gay."<br />
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Do you see the problem? Do you see how not-like-Christ it is when Christians thrust daggers into people's souls?<br />
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There are many things that Jesus said to sinners. None of them were hope-crushing, soul-wounding words of hatred. Maybe it will help to give some examples:<br />
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"Your sins are forgiven." (Matthew 9:2)<br />
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"What would you like me to do for you?" (Matthew 20:32)<br />
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"Don't be afraid, just believe." (Mark 5:36)<br />
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"All things are possible to the one who believes." (Mark 9:23)<br />
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"You are not far from the kingdom of God." (Mark 12:34)<br />
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"Truly I say to you, today you will be with me in Paradise." (Luke 23:43)<br />
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"What do you seek?" (John 1:38)<br />
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"Give me a drink." (John 4:7)<br />
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"Do you wish to get well?" (John 5:6)<br />
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"Woman, where are they? Did no one condemn you?" (John 8:10)<br />
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"Whom do you seek?" (John 18:4)<br />
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"Why are you crying?" (John 20:15)<br />
<br />Misty Ironshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03375350124307819943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31915439.post-57985207242692097452016-02-19T13:49:00.000-08:002016-06-18T15:04:26.441-07:00Repost from 6/24/09: What does it cost to bridge the gap?<i>At the most recent GCN Conference, someone asked me to define what it means to be a "straight ally." I answered that it's mainly about being willing to pay the price for supporting LGBT people, and there usually is a price to be paid.</i><br />
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<i>While the cost of dealing with persecution and social pressures may immediately come to mind, there is also the cost of dealing with your own heart issues. I talk more about that in this post from 2009:</i><br />
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<b>How can we as straight conservative Christians</b> "bridge the gap" in our conversations and relationships with gay friends, family members and acquaintances on the topic of homosexuality? Most evangelicals are easily able to summarize what the Bible teaches about how to relate to our neighbors: Christians should be loving and kind, patient when wronged, respectful in the face of hostility, forgiving, humble, compassionate and truthful.<br />
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So the question isn't knowing how we ought conduct ourselves as Christians. What needs to be explored is <i>why</i> we so often fail to relate to gay people in the loving and winsome way that the Bible so clearly outlines.<br />
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I believe the answer is that straight Christians cannot bring down the walls between ourselves and the gay community until we have confronted the walls that exist in our own hearts--fear, pride, insecurity about our own faith. The biggest challenges are not "out there," rather they lie within. I remember the three biggest challenges I faced when, as a conservative Christian, I first began the process of building bridges with people in the gay community.<br />
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When I first became interested in trying to understand where gay and lesbian people were coming from, I had already been taught by many highly respected church leaders that "homosexuals" were particularly depraved individuals who had strayed so far from the will of God they actually chose to pervert themselves by living the gay lifestyle. A good Christian girl like me would have absolutely nothing in common with these sordid types, so I initially thought my big challenge would be knowing how to talk to them at all. Yet what I encountered in real life was completely different from what I had been told to expect. I met ordinary people, many of whom were professing Christians, who never wanted to be gay in the first place. Some had contemplated suicide in their teens, others had spent their young adult years in therapy trying to change. Many finally came to terms with their situation only later on in life and at last found the courage to make the best of it. I felt it would have been wrong to despise these people, and I even found myself relating on so many levels to the heart-breaking stories I heard.<br />
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I had been told to hate the sin of homosexuality. What I encountered were people who had fought a battle with self-hatred for so long, the last thing I wanted to do was dogpile on their pain. I had been told to enlighten these people with the gospel. What I encountered was only my own tremendous ignorance, my own need to be enlightened about what it was like to be in their shoes.<br />
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<b>And so the first challenge</b> I faced was whether to follow the righteous exhortations of godly Christian leaders I admired and trusted, or go with my own instincts in an entirely different direction, based on my own conclusions about gay people that--apparently--no other Christian in the world had ever come to except me. (Or so it seemed.)<br />
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Any serious Christian would much rather submit to the majority consensus of the church than run the risk of being wise in one's own eyes. I wasn't any different. What ultimately made me press forward was that I saw clear opportunities before me to love people instead of despise them, to understand instead of judge, to listen instead of command--and that path just seemed more in line with what the Bible taught. It was as simple as that. And yet even though I knew I had good reason to follow that path, I was sick with fear. Fear of being a maverick, fear of being unsubmissive, fear that I might appear rebellious, fear that my reputation in the church might be damaged. All that fear was a barrier that needed to be crossed.<br />
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<b>This soon led to the second major challenge</b> I had to confront, which was the difficulty of having to face people at church every Sunday, knowing that I was going against the standard wisdom that most of them embraced about gay people. The church had always been like family to me, from the time I first came to Christ as a teenager. My fellow Christians were people who worshipped with me, invited me over for dinner, prayed for me when I was in need, brought meals to my house when I was laid up, loaded boxes into my U-Haul when I had to move--and I did the same for them in return. To go against what these good people, my dearest friends, believed about homosexuality, and to side instead with what everyone called "the homosexual agenda," felt like the worst kind of betrayal. Like some bout with insanity that I just needed to snap out of.<br />
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The only way I could to deal with the nearly unbearable tension was to remember that as much as my church family meant to me, my first responsibility was to follow Jesus Christ. And I simply found it difficult to believe that Jesus would reach out to harlots, tax collectors, demoniacs, lepers and heretics but would disapprove of me reaching out to gays and lesbians, because it might upset some of my Christian friends. So in my heart I had to let go of my need for my friends' good opinion. Later on, when some of them found out my views and let go of me for good, I remembered Jesus once again, that by the time he'd made it to the cross at the end of his life he was alone. It meant that however painful loneliness might be, I could at least take comfort that there was no shame in it.<br />
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<b>The third major challenge</b> was probably the most serious. As I got deeper into the issue--talking with gay and lesbian people, reading books, having email exchanges--I began to realize that the conclusions I was coming to about the nature of homosexuality were presenting a challenge to my own Bible-believing faith. Because if people weren't choosing to be gay, why would God allow this to happen to them? Why would he allow something to befall them that would so alienate them from their families, their communities, their churches? Why would he allow their chance of enjoying a love that could be both personally fulfilling and socially acceptable to be permanently sabotaged? Is God cruel? Is the Bible mistaken?<br />
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Over time my faith survived these challenges, and has even grown stronger as a result. But I can also appreciate how much easier it is for us to burrow deep down into our churches and cling to simple, cut-and-dried explanations about homosexuality rather than expose the vulnerabilities of our faith to something much more complex. And yet if we are willing to admit this much, we should at least try to be honest with ourselves when it comes to befriending gay and lesbian people. How much of our inability to love them is rooted in our personal insecurity about our Christian faith? When we argue with them, aren't we sometimes just trying to protect our own beliefs? When we insist that they are unrighteous, might that be just another way of asserting our own righteousness, so that we can temporarily silence the doubts we have about ourselves as Christians?<br />
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I have been on this journey for nearly ten years, and although it may appear to others, and even to myself at times, that this has been about trying to break down walls and build bridges between myself and gay and lesbian people, I know that for me it is really about something far greater. Like many of the challenges that Jesus Christ calls me to, I realize that his ultimate purpose for me has not been the challenge itself, but to teach me more about himself, so that I might understand more deeply his life, his heart and his word. Simply put, I have had to trust him. For that reason, I could never regret any of it, whatever the journey has cost me along the way. I have become richer in Christ, and that has fully compensated me for whatever else I may have lost.Misty Ironshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03375350124307819943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31915439.post-33635884898873544052016-02-08T20:24:00.001-08:002016-02-08T22:35:21.229-08:00Welcome, listeners of The Ken Fong PodcastIf you found this blog because of my interview on "<a href="http://asianamericapodcast.com/?podcasts=misty-irons" target="_blank">Asian America: The Ken Fong Podcast</a>," I'm glad you found your way here!<br />
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To make it easier to find out more about what Ken and I discussed during the interview, I've compiled the following links:<br />
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Here is the <a href="http://livestream.com/GCNconf/events/4664542" target="_blank">video of my keynote speech</a> at the 2016 GCN (Gay Christian Network) Conference this past January. The video does skip some, so here is the <a href="https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B-upeCwMJqfCS2NMLUctVmRVcjQ/view" target="_blank">full written transcript</a> to that keynote.<br />
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"<a href="http://www.musingson.com/ccCase.html" target="_blank">A Conservative Christian Case for Civil Same-Sex Marriage</a>" -- the controversial article I wrote in 2000.<br />
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This is a <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3oFZsF1LxmU&feature=youtu.be" target="_blank">YouTube video of my keynote</a> back at the 2012 GCN Conference in which I explain about the controversy my husband and I had with our old denomination, the Orthodox Presbyterian Church. (Unfortunately, this video does not cover the complete talk; it is just a homemade video one of the conference attendees recorded of the last two-thirds of my talk.)<br />
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"<a href="http://www.musingson.com/" target="_blank">Musings on Christianity, Homosexuality and the Bible</a>," the original website I created back in 2000 to reach out to gays and lesbians.<br />
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<a href="http://www.upper-register.com/irons_trial/musingson/chronology_musingson.html" target="_blank">Chronology of events</a> and <a href="http://www.upper-register.com/about.html" target="_blank">trial documents</a> relating to the OPC controversy my husband and I were involved in.<br />
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Toward the end of the interview Ken asked me if there was anything in my background that shaped me into the type of person that would speak out in the church for the gay and lesbian community. Upon reflection I'm not sure how I managed to overlook one very important factor: being "<a href="http://moremusingson.blogspot.com/2008/01/japanese-american.html" target="_blank">Japanese American.</a>"<br />
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So you're a straight Christian who wants to understand better how to relate to someone who is gay? Here are some blog posts to help get you started:</div>
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<li>"How gays and straights talk past each other": <a href="http://moremusingson.blogspot.com/2006/09/how-christians-and-gays-talk-past-each.html" target="_blank">Part 1</a>, <a href="http://moremusingson.blogspot.com/2006/09/how-christians-and-gays-talk-past-each_20.html" target="_blank">Part 2</a> and <a href="http://moremusingson.blogspot.com/2007/04/how-christians-and-gays-talk-past-each.html" target="_blank">Part 3</a> -- This short series is a primer to help foster communication across the gay-straight divide.</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li>"On having gay friends": <a href="http://moremusingson.blogspot.com/2013/08/on-having-gay-friends.html" target="_blank">Part 1</a> and <a href="http://moremusingson.blogspot.com/2014/01/on-having-gay-friends-part-2.html" target="_blank">Part 2</a> -- Some tips and reflections compiled from what I've learned over the years.</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li>"<a href="http://moremusingson.blogspot.com/2011/11/side-b-with-qualifications.html" target="_blank">Side B, with qualifications</a>" -- Ken and I talked about the Side A/Side B debate among gay Christians. In this post I explain why, as a straight ally, I don't take a hard-line Side B approach in the debate.</li>
</ul>
</div>
<ul>
<li>"<a href="http://moremusingson.blogspot.com/2007/07/surviving-ex-gay-ministries.html" target="_blank">Surviving ex-gay ministries</a>" -- In 2007 I attended an Ex-Gay Survivor Conference and learned first-hand about the trauma ex-gay ministries have caused people. In this post I attempt to put myself in the shoes of an ex-gay survivor and tell their story.</li>
</ul>
<br />Misty Ironshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03375350124307819943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31915439.post-88422996023626879052016-02-08T16:31:00.002-08:002016-02-08T16:35:58.236-08:00My interview on "Asian America: the Ken Fong Podcast"Last Friday I was interviewed on <a href="http://asianamericapodcast.com/?podcasts=misty-irons&&autoplay=yes" target="_blank">Asian America: The Ken Fong Podcast</a>. Heads up: the interview is eighty minutes long, but I think we were able to keep the conversation flowing and interesting. If you have a long commute to work, listening to this would be perfect to help you pass the time.<br />
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<br /></div>
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Ken Fong is the long-time pastor of a well-known Asian American church in Los Angeles called Evergreen Baptist Church. He also serves as Executive Director of the Asian American Initiative at Fuller Theological Seminary. We recorded this podcast in his Fuller Seminary office.<br />
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<div>
I know Ken as a fellow sojourner who is seeking to bring about love, respect and understanding between the LGBT community and the conservative church. Because we are both Asian American, conservative evangelical, and have taken an interest in the LGBT community, Ken and I have crossed paths before. I suppose we fit a unique demographic, and I'm grateful to him for the opportunity to be a guest on his show.</div>
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Misty Ironshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03375350124307819943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31915439.post-18437045788848332222016-01-28T10:07:00.000-08:002016-01-28T18:00:09.214-08:00Yes, I am Side B. No, I do not advocate celibacy for all gay Christians.<div class="tr_bq">
Apparently, in spite of my recent and very public <a href="http://livestream.com/GCNconf/events/4664542/videos/108793052?t=1452758806112" target="_blank">2016 GCN Conference talk</a>, there is still some misunderstanding about my Side B position. A <a href="http://othersheepexecsite.com/wp/2016/01/12/celibacy-at-gay-christian-network-whats-that-all-about-2/" target="_blank">recent article</a> written by Stephen Parelli, who was present at the conference, called <a href="http://othersheepexecsite.com/wp/2016/01/12/celibacy-at-gay-christian-network-whats-that-all-about-2/" target="_blank">"Celibacy at Gay Christian Network: What's that all about?"</a> characterizes me as advocating celibacy for all gay Christians.</div>
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I never advocated such a position in my <a href="http://livestream.com/GCNconf/events/4664542/videos/108793052?t=1452758806112" target="_blank">keynote</a>, and I never have advocated that position on this blog or in any past writings. The <a href="https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B-upeCwMJqfCS2NMLUctVmRVcjQ/view" target="_blank">entire point of my GCN keynote</a> was this: "Yes, I am Side B. But I believe Side A gay Christians should be accepted in the church in an 'agree to disagree' fashion according to the principles of Romans 14. Now, allow me to explain why I think the conservative church has been too blind in the past to see this truth, and how being obedient to Scripture can lead us out of this mess."<br />
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Over four years ago on this blog I wrote a piece called <a href="http://moremusingson.blogspot.com/2011/11/side-b-with-qualifications.html" target="_blank">"Side B with Qualifications"</a> that might be helpful to anyone wanting to understand further why I call myself Side B. Here is how I conclude my post (italics added):<br />
<blockquote>
This has caused me some problems. I have discovered that labeling myself Side B conveys the idea that I think Side A gay Christians aren't really saved, that all gay Christians should be celibate otherwise they're living in sin, and that my agenda should be to befriend Side A people for the purpose of converting them to Side B. And I have to wonder, <i>what ever happened to respecting the consciences of others?</i> I believe I can manage that as a Side B person. And nothing about what I believe concerning my imaginary choice as an imaginary gay person in an imaginary scenario blinds me from <i>the reality of seeing true Christian faith in the many, many Side A gay Christians I meet all the time.</i></blockquote>
<blockquote>
From what I've experienced I don't think the Side A/Side B divide is nearly as great as the divide between those who do and do not recognize that there are some cases where taking a "biblical" side is more about a personal choice than a cosmic mandate. I side with those who believe in strict moral convictions for themselves but <i>much leniency and charity for others</i>. I wish there were a label for that group.</blockquote>
Misty Ironshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03375350124307819943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31915439.post-2811323005786872432016-01-11T13:53:00.000-08:002016-01-11T14:00:04.163-08:00"What's Next for the Conservative Evangelical Church?"For those of you who made the request, I am here providing the manuscript of my 2016 GCN conference talk, "<a href="https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B-upeCwMJqfCS2NMLUctVmRVcjQ/view?usp=sharing" target="_blank">What's Next for the Conservative Evangelical Church?</a>"<br />
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The talk was also <a href="http://livestream.com/GCNconf/events/4664542" target="_blank">live streamed</a> but sometimes the video skips, which I understand can be annoying.<br />
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I loved meeting all of you at the conference. Even though I sometimes have trouble remembering names and faces, if you told me your story I almost always remember that. When people tell me about their personal experience I can visualize and sometimes feel the emotions of it, and that leaves a strong impression. So if you told me your story, remind me of it if you'd like to drop me an email, and that will help me continue our conversation.<br />
<br />Misty Ironshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03375350124307819943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31915439.post-30364147923803959222015-12-22T22:50:00.000-08:002015-12-22T22:50:29.588-08:00GCN Conference 2016I will be speaking at the upcoming <a href="https://gcnconf.com/" target="_blank">GCN Conference</a>, taking place in Houston on January 7-10, 2016. So the past three months I have been deep in my thinking cave, thoroughly neglecting this blog even though there is more on my mind regarding transgender issues. Apparently I am a "nationally acclaimed blogger and theologian." I had to laugh at that. Maybe "at one time nationally vilified and now thoroughly ignored" is more accurate. Anyhow, if you are planning to be at the conference, I hope to see you there.Misty Ironshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03375350124307819943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31915439.post-42568636452738415302015-10-10T09:28:00.000-07:002015-10-10T10:25:54.003-07:00Demanding a biological basis for gender identitySome years ago I read about a male pastor who was kicked out of his denomination because it came out that he sometimes wanted to identify as a woman. Most of the time he was fine with presenting himself as a man, but some of the time he wanted to present as a woman and even chose a female name for that part of himself.<br />
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His church freaked out, of course, and gave him the ax. Yet there was a reasonable explanation for this pastor's behavior. Before he was born, when he was still in his mother's womb, he had a fraternal twin sister. Instead of separating and becoming another person, she somehow ended up fusing back with him so that the two of them formed a single person. As a result he was, in his biological make up, 70% male and 30% female. There is even a term for someone who is has two different sets of DNA as a result of absorbing a fraternal twin back into their body in utero: <a href="http://pictorial.jezebel.com/one-person-two-sets-of-dna-the-strange-case-of-the-hu-1689290862" target="_blank">human chimera</a>.<br />
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In the current debate over transgender people, many Christians are saying that it is just plain common sense that if someone is biologically male then he should view himself as male, and if someone is biologically female then she should see herself as female. Period. With no room for debate. If this were an ideal, unfallen world prior to Genesis chapter 3, I would heartily agree. But here and now, living in this messy, fallen state of humankind, it is not so. Instead we have this case of a pastor who was biologically both male and female. If biology directly determines one's personal sense of gender self-identity, then this pastor was being true to that principle. Even the proportion of time he wanted to spend as male versus female was true to the proportion that he was biologically male versus female.<br />
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Yet the reason this pastor was run out of his denomination was that he <i>looked</i> physically male and therefore he was expected to act and identify as such exclusively. The basis for his wanting to identify partly as female was hidden from the human eye, and yet it was very real. It could even have been scientifically proven through genetic testing.<br />
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In the case of transgender individuals, just because the basis for their desire to identify with a gender opposite of their (apparent) biological sex is hidden from our eyes, that doesn't mean it isn't real. Are we really so arrogant that we can dismiss this crisis of identity that they feel, as if we know everything there is to know about human beings, our mysterious formation in the womb, the human brain, genetics, and the origins of gender identity? The discovery that human chimeras exist is a relatively recent one. Who knows what else there is to discover about ourselves as human beings?<br />
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Here's something else to consider. Why do Christians need to know if there is a scientific explanation for the transgender experience before we stop our mistreatment of them: this merciless sneering and mocking and condemning of people whom we have made <i>zero</i> effort to understand? I thought the Bible was the basis of everything we do. We already know that Jesus commanded us to love people and refrain from judging them, because after all we do not see the heart and have no idea what sort of challenges they may be facing.<br />
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Of course, we can always wait around for science to uncover the reasons for the transgender experience--someday--before we feel like taking seriously Jesus' command to love these people. It's just that, given the way we normally scorn modern science almost as much as we do transgender people, I think that would be extremely ironic.<br />
<br />Misty Ironshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03375350124307819943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31915439.post-22517898693980654102015-07-01T22:54:00.000-07:002015-07-01T22:54:28.940-07:00Is polygamy next?Jonathan Rauch has made these arguments many times before, but in case you missed it, he <a href="http://www.politico.com/magazine/story/2015/06/polygamy-not-next-gay-marriage-119614.html#.VZTNsmRVikp" target="_blank">explains once again</a> why the legalization of civil same-sex marriage doesn't open the legal door to polygamy.<br />
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<blockquote class="tr_bq">
Now, people who want to take issue with the theoretical and empirical literature on polygamy should feel free to do so. What they should not do is what Chief Justice Roberts and Fredrik deBoer do, which is to ignore the literature altogether. Blandly asserting that there's no good reason to oppose polygamy once gay couples can marry makes no more sense than saying there's no reason to oppose date rape or securities fraud once gay couples can marry. It doesn't follow, and it isn't true, and the intellectual laziness implicit in asserting it is epic.</blockquote>
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To find out why Rauch thinks so, read his article <a href="http://www.politico.com/magazine/story/2015/06/polygamy-not-next-gay-marriage-119614.html#.VZTPe2RViko" target="_blank">here</a>.
Misty Ironshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03375350124307819943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31915439.post-80523919464505255712015-06-27T14:42:00.000-07:002015-06-27T17:33:43.202-07:00Looking back and moving forwardFourteen and a half years ago I wrote an essay called, "<a href="http://musingson.com/ccCase.html" target="_blank">A Conservative Christian Case for Civil Same-Sex Marriage</a>." I wanted to show that Christians can still hold to a traditional understanding of the Bible on homosexuality without being guilty of committing political and social injustice against gays and lesbians. I also wanted to point out how engaging in an earthly battle that prevents a minority group from receiving their legitimate constitutional rights only tarnishes our Christian witness to the hope of heaven through Jesus Christ.<br />
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Yesterday's SCOTUS decision is, in my view, the prevailing of earthly justice. Given the way our constitution is written, plus the history of the civil rights movement in this country, it was inevitable that this day would come. What's important for Christians is not that this day has come, but that we reflect upon all the years that have led up to it. How honorably have we conducted ourselves these past fifteen or so years? How profitably have we redeemed the time? Have we adorned the gospel in our interactions with the LGBT community? Is there anything we wish we could have done differently?<br />
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It has often helped me to realize that when you follow Christ, you follow him alone. You don't take your family with you, though you'd like to think you can. You can't take your friends with you. And certainly there is nothing you can do about everyone in society. All that's under your control is how obedient you are to Christ in your own personal relationship with him.<br />
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But we don't want to be his disciples under those conditions. We want to obey only if everyone else is doing the same thing. If same-sex marriage is wrong, we aren't content to hold to that belief with a clear conscience before the Lord. We want everyone else to believe it too. We don't want our children to have anything to do with it. We don't want society to approve of it. We definitely can't handle the idea that God may be leading us to view it as a sin and yet be leading someone else to the conclusion that is it okay.<br />
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What everyone else is believing and doing is irrelevant to your responsibility toward Christ, which is to follow him yourself, alone, according to how he is instructing your own heart. You can't know what God is doing in the lives of others, and you aren't meant to. When Peter pointed to the disciple John and asked Jesus, "But Lord, what about this man?" Jesus answered, "If I want him to remain until I come, what is that to you? You follow me!" (John 21:21-22)<br />
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You follow me. There is freedom and joy in doing what the Lord asks of you without fretting about what he is asking of someone else. Without fretting about where society is headed and whether we are still a Christian nation and whether the next generation will believe things and do things the way you want them to. Moving forward, here's hoping the next fifteen years will be about less fretting and more lonely, single-minded discipleship.<br />
<br />Misty Ironshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03375350124307819943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31915439.post-83280791989070905222015-06-09T11:13:00.001-07:002015-06-09T11:13:53.983-07:00Yarhouse on the transgender phenomenonI recommend Mark Yarhouse's recent article in <i>Christianity Today</i>, "<a href="http://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/2015/july-august/understanding-transgender-gender-dysphoria.html?share=rHkEQ%20JltTuP96TRZ2jlNsEcL2n7Bj4Q" target="_blank">Understanding the Transgender Phenomenon,</a>" for Christians who are looking for a beginner's introduction this issue.<br />
<br />Misty Ironshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03375350124307819943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31915439.post-68314392228250765892015-06-03T11:31:00.001-07:002015-06-03T11:46:53.735-07:00T is for TransgenderI've been thinking about transgender issues for a number of years now, but I've been somewhat intimidated at the thought of writing about it. The main reason is that the vocabulary involved is not only endlessly complex, but I've noticed that people who are in-the-know can be very offended when novices like myself come into the discussion and misuse terms. So, in the interest of full-disclosure of my limited knowledge, here's a summary of what I've learned thus far.<br />
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I know that you say "transgender" and not "transgendered." I know that there is a difference between "sex" (which has to do with your biological makeup) and "gender" (which has to do with your self-identity). I also know that non-transgender people like myself are called "cisgender." And I've learned that sexual orientation and gender identity issues are separate from each other; that cross-dressing is not necessarily an indication that one is transgender; that the term "transition" means taking steps toward making your outward identity and personal expression match your inner gender identity; and that some people transition "male-to-female" while others transition "female-to-male."<br />
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Even though I have found some of the vocabulary terms difficult, the basic human issues are not. For instance, as a straight person writing about gay issues I really had to wrestle with the idea of same-sex sexual orientation, but as someone who is cisgender I relate rather easily to having a strong inner sense of gender identity. I know I'm a woman, not just due to my biology but because I know myself to be female inside. So when I hear that a transgender woman feels the same way I do, except she is in a body that does not properly express her gender identity, the tragedy of that situation hits home.<br />
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Few things are more central to our sense of personal identity than gender identity. Through my friendships with gay and lesbian individuals, I've learned just how important sexuality is to us as human beings. When someone says "being gay is who I am" I understand what he or she is trying to express. If sexuality is that important to one's sense of self, gender identity is more so. In the beginning "God created man in his own image . . . male and female he created them" (Genesis 1:27). As creatures of dust, gender is so integral to who we are created to be it is mentioned in the same breath as being made in the image of God.<br />
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If you're a Christian, you understand that the world didn't continue on as God originally made it in Genesis 1:27. Because of Adam and Eve's sin we now live in a world that isn't so neat and tidy, which probably has something to do with why some people's gender self-identity doesn't match up with the gender indicated by their biological sex. Perhaps some people are born with a male soul (or male brain) in a female body, or vice versa. Like many fallen conditions this dilemma is nobody's fault, and it is very real and painful to those who are born into it. Unfortunately it cannot be eradicated any more than you can go back in time and eradicate the Fall, so the thing to do is not to quote Bible verses at people as if we are still living in Paradise. Instead we recognize that during this time of Romans 8-style groaning, we need to respond to it as we would to any human pain: with compassion and understanding. I'd suggest, too, that it is wiser not to pass judgment on the decisions people make to alleviate their own pain, especially if you have never walked in their shoes.<br />
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Many Christians believe that such talk is dangerous, because it means we won't be taking male and female gender distinctions seriously. I beg to differ. What could be more illustrative of recognizing gender differences than a trans person who feels the need to have his or her outward appearance and presentation match his or her true inner gender? If a trans person is saying that there really is no male and female distinction, then it shouldn't matter to him/her how they present themselves to the outward world. Male . . . female . . . who cares, right? Yet it obviously <i>does</i> matter to them. If you feel you are female inside, you want to look like a female and be accepted as such. The same goes for those who identify as male. The oppressiveness trans people experience when they are treated as if they were one gender when they really identify as the other demonstrates how seriously they take these gender differences.<br />
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But here's something else to consider. While God did originally create human beings to be male and female for marriage and procreation in this earthly life, there are also strong hints in the New Testament that in the new heavens and new earth, gender won't be that important. Jesus said that after the resurrection there will be no marrying or giving in marriage because everyone will be like "angels of God in heaven" (Matthew 22:30). Paul said that in Christ "there is neither male nor female" (Galatians 3:28), which is a statement that anticipates the radical equality of men and women existing as co-heirs in heaven. There is no doubt that Paul and Jesus still affirmed and recognized gender distinctions and gender roles in this earthly life. Yet at the same time they were looking beyond to the world to come where we will be so transformed in glory, everything we recognize now as male and female in our earthly bodies will be elevated to such a transcendent existence, we may very well be beyond gender categories. As Jesus said, we will be like the angels.<br />
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If a brother or sister in Christ is dealing with being transgender, why not allow them the freedom to seek whatever temporary relief they need to make their earthly journey bearable until all is resolved in glory? Someday the resurrection and glorification of the body will bring permanent peace to the trans individual, but only God can give that gift. In the meantime, the gifts he asks us to give to them as they labor through this earthly pilgrimage are our love, sympathy and understanding.Misty Ironshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03375350124307819943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31915439.post-40355639495044651942014-10-28T17:38:00.000-07:002014-10-28T17:42:02.024-07:00Ten Things I've Learned As a Straight Conservative Christian Blogging on Homosexuality1. No straight person can fully appreciate how difficult it is to be gay in a largely heterosexual world.<br />
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2. As soon as someone equates "homosexuality" with "having gay sex," the rest of what they have to say on the subject will be pretty much useless.<br />
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3. When some Christians hear the word "love," all they think is "liberalism."<br />
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4. "Gay Christian"--until you can think of a better, more accurate term, it stays.<br />
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5. You can't understand someone else's sexual orientation unless you first understand your own.<br />
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6. Christians who are determined to be persecuted by gays can't be convinced otherwise.<br />
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7. How much you believe God loves and accepts others in Christ is a reflection of how much you believe he loves and accepts you.<br />
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8. Love begins with listening to what people have to say about themselves.<br />
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9. Conservative Christians should have no problem with celibate gay Christians, unless they have a problem with the gospel.<br />
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10. Don't assume God brought someone gay into your life so you can teach them. Chances are it is the other way around.<br />
<br />Misty Ironshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03375350124307819943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31915439.post-21380593265442714742014-09-04T14:54:00.000-07:002014-09-04T22:45:40.893-07:00What will happen if I love?<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color: black; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><i><span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;">"The
Christian ideal has not been tried and found wanting; it has been found
difficult and left untried." - G.K. Chesterton</span></i><span style="font-family: Tahoma;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div>
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<span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color: black; font-size: 12pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span></span></div>
There must be a reason Jesus told us that loving our neighbor is the greatest commandment next to loving God. He not only commanded us to love but he went out and did it himself without regard for his own reputation, safety, popularity. . . and ultimately his life. The rabbi who defended adulteresses and prostitutes. The holy man who touched lepers and other unclean types. The king who was abandoned to torture, mockery and a humiliating public death.<br />
<br />
We speak of his suffering in reverent tones because that's how he atoned for our sins. That's the theological side of the story. But the human side of the story is that his sufferings came about as a direct result of loving all those despised, unwanted people. The hatred, the persecution and the outrage that led to his crucifixion came about because he healed a withered man's hand on the Sabbath and stood up for a prostitute who dumped a fortune in perfume on his feet and other such scandals. So when Jesus commands us to love as he loved--and also commands us to suffer as he suffered--he is speaking of two sides of the same coin. You cannot love the way he loved and not suffer the kinds of consequences he did.<br />
<br />
Many Christians will fight you tooth and nail if you dare to bring up loving gay and lesbian people. The way they talk, you'd almost think there was a verse in the New Testament where Jesus answered and said to his disciples, "Know that you should love one another, as long as the conditions are right. Amen." That must be it, because all I ever hear is: I know we should love people, but I oppose the gay agenda. I know we should love people, but I'm not going to approve of their sin. I know we should love people, but they're indoctrinating my child at school. I know we should love people, but I'm not going to be manipulated by a bunch of sob stories.<br />
<br />
What I'm actually hearing is this: Love sounds like a great idea, but I'm afraid if I love I something bad will happen. Yes, something bad will happen, but not what you think. Loving gay people probably won't lead you to approve of sexual sin, but it will most likely get you accused by fellow Christians of approving of it. It won't mean you'll support schools indoctrinating your children about homosexuality, but you will have to face the more real worry that the church is indoctrinating them to despise gay people. And you will definitely listen to people's sob stories, but instead of feeling manipulated you will never stop aching over the needless pain and injustice so many gays and lesbians suffer on a daily basis.<br />
<br />
Simply put, loving gays and lesbians will mean many of your friends will forsake you, you will never be a part of the "in" crowd at church, your reputation will be tarnished, and you will carry the sorrows of others around in your heart until you feel like you're going to break. Downside: you will suffer. Upside: you will know the blessing of following in the path of a certain Someone who walked in those sufferings before you.<br />
<br />Misty Ironshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03375350124307819943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31915439.post-75252847178242988302014-07-02T20:17:00.000-07:002014-07-02T20:19:12.026-07:00"Anger Issues with God"My article, <a href="http://issuu.com/prismmagazine/docs/prism-_summer_-2014/44" target="_blank">"Anger Issues with God,"</a> was published in the summer 2014 issue of PRISM magazine. <a href="http://issuu.com/prismmagazine/docs/prism-_summer_-2014/44" target="_blank">Check it out</a>.Misty Ironshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03375350124307819943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31915439.post-53102661755414401262014-06-27T14:47:00.000-07:002014-06-27T15:02:28.158-07:00Discomfort levelI just heard recently that a gay Christian friend of mine is going to be leaving his conservative church. Even though he is not in a gay relationship and never has been, he is being shunned by a core group of people in the congregation. The only excuse they have given for the way they treat him is, "We're not at a place where we feel comfortable interacting with gay people."<br />
<br />
Sure, I get it. That's my favorite Bible verse too. The one that says, "They will know that we are Christians by the way we love only those brothers and sisters with whom we have come to a place where we feel comfortable interacting."<br />
<br />
Which also brings to mind some of my favorite passages out of the Gospels where Jesus goes around touching, healing, befriending and sharing meals only with the people with whom he had gotten to a place where he felt comfortable interacting. Because if you want to change the world, that's the winning formula right there.<br />
<br />
Speaking of changing the world, I can't recall any time in church history where the gospel caught fire and spread because Christians were interacting only with those respectable people with whom they felt comfortable. Saint Patrick, who is credited with bringing Christianity to Ireland, largely ministered to slave girls who suffered being raped regularly by their masters. John Wycliffe was the first to translate the Bible in English for the benefit of lay people, whom the church of his day regarded as "swine." John and Charles Wesley were condemned by the clergy of their day for preaching the gospel in open fields to the uneducated masses.<br />
<br />
If there's any spiritual lesson to be learned from the past, it is run, don't walk, from any temptation to center your Christian life around being comfortable, respectable and insulated. No great spiritual advancement has ever happened in the kingdom of God because Christians were afraid to love the really tough-to-love people.<br />
<br />
Which is why there's hope for my gay Christian friends, because I see so many of them struggling to love their straight brothers and sisters in Christ in spite of our perverse ignorance and obnoxious self-righteousness. From a certain perspective <i>we</i> are the really tough-to-love people, not them. We need to understand the true nature of our spiritual situation. If we don't get our act together and learn how to love, the kingdom will surely march forward without us. And gay Christians will be leading the way.<br />
<br />
Am I being sentimental or hyperbolic when I say that? Let me put it this way. If you want to know how God is working to advance his kingdom, observe what he is doing among the people on the margins. The poor, the homeless, the persecuted, the forsaken, the ill, the feeble, and the despised. God calls his people from within those situations and uses suffering to train them in love, forgiveness, patience and meekness. They may never get to be senior pastor at the newest megachurch everyone is flocking to. They may never even be allowed to lead a Bible study. They may struggle just to be accepted in their churches. But they are the ones whom Christ will lift up, they are the ones he will strengthen, and they are the ones he will reveal himself to. If you despise them, you do so at your own spiritual peril.<br />
<br />Misty Ironshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03375350124307819943noreply@blogger.com